Bring Back the "Mommy Pants"

Bring back the "Mommy Pants". Maybe you've heard of them referred to that way. You know, the pants we all wore back in the 80's and 90's where the waistband of the pants was actually at your waist - above the belly button.

I actually saw an old 1990's movie the other day with Lisa Hartman Black in those very type of jeans, skinny as a rail, with a shirt tucked in no less! I shouted "Look, she's wearing mommy pants"! But they weren't referred to as "mommy pants" back then - they were perfectly in style.

I think I heard them referred to as "mommy pants" on some before and after fashion show, you know the one where they take some poor slob off the street and give her a whole new look that you can do at home too! IF you had a team of 20 people washing, dying, highlighting, low-lighting, blow-drying and PAYING for all those expense clothes and hair do's. And let's not forget the make-up that only a TV make-up crew can achieve. You can't seem to find those flawless complexions in your neighborhood drug store.

But I digress. The reason for my rant, is I hate looking, trying-on and buying clothes, don't get me wrong, I wasn't always this way, no. First I look for something I like, which can be in and of itself a feat some "season's" with the gawd-awful Chartreuse (sorry to all the chartreuse lovers) they say is the "in" color.

I like something that attracts my eye, has a classic style, then I have to search (hopelessly) to find 1 pair, just one pair, even if it's February and they JUST brought out the spring collection that day, for a pair in my size - no such luck (I know I'm not getting any sympathy on that one this because I'm a size 3!).

But here's the real crux, have you ever tried on the new, hip, cool (or mad-nice in teenage lingo) low-rise pants, you know the ones where the waist is just above our va-jay-jay and your baby-belly (not the one where you're pregnant - they one AFTER you've been pregnant) hangs out over them like over grown baked bread!

Trying to be hip, trying to be cool, you end up looking like the Michelin-Man! So to counteract that, we are suppose to wear "support underwear" that ironically comes up to your waist (you
know, right above your belly-button). Which makes you feel oh-so-sexy, and is kinda missing the whole point of wearing low-rise pants in the first place.

But apparently the teenagers don't seem to mind having a little glob of flesh hanging out over their pants, they even go so far as the wear the shorty shirts that SHOW OFF the little glob of flesh. Back in my day, you wouldn't get caught dead like that.

You remember - everything used to be loose! Shirts and pants! I blame this new fashion trend on the TV show "Friends" and Mariah Carey. I remember when Friends first came out, I thought "OMG look how T - I - G - H - T those shirts are! and Mariah for cutting off the waist band on her jeans because they "felt better" that
way.

So let's bring back those "Mommy Pants", you know the one's that hold "all that in" from your hips all the way up to your actual waist-line.

p.s. For anyone out there who are currently wearing mommy pants, I'm sure you've realized what most older American women know, everything old is new again - eventually they will come back - just like those gawd-awful elephant pants (oops, hope I haven't offended any elephant pant wearing women out there today!)